Three Tips for developing and maintaining relationships in the workplace

Hello Readers,

Answer this question, how many of your close friends started with a relationship developed in the workplace? I can name quite a few, however I can only name 2 or 3 that I am still in contact with today. We as adults go to work to earn a paycheck and do satisfying work along the way (well that is the way it should be); however, we WILL meet people and start to develop relationships. We do not “plan” to meet anyone but, because we are human and we need to “feel” loved we will naturally seek to talk to people whether you are introverted or extroverted. I have learned along the way some of the relationships are just for “work” and some are for a life time. I follow these three tips to help me in discerning relationships at work.

1. Give and Take. No this is not being selfish. In any relationship there should be a give and take factor. I can look at all of my friends whether I met them at work or not and I can see where I can contribute to them and I can see where they contribute to me. Ask yourself do you find yourself always giving to the other party and receiving nothing in return? If yes, this relationship will not last. If you are the taker, then you may want to start evaluating how you can give to the other party. There should be some level ground, it may not be 50/50 all the time but, you will know how to gauge who is giving/taking more.

2. Is there a foundation away from work? Seems like a simple factor however, very profound. If work is all you and the other party can speak about when you talk, then you may want to evaluate this relationship and accept it for what it is (a work relationship, nothing more). The easiest method for this is to ask what else you share in common with the other party. Majority of ALL relationships have something in common, there has to be something that connected you to that person in the first place. Remember what brought you and the other person together. 

3. Support. A “true” friend will tell you the truth and not hide anything from you. They will always have your best interest at heart and they will not take someone else's word about you over what they have come to learn about you themselves. Can you meet this person at work? Yes you can. True friends are developed at work all the time. Simply follow steps 1 and 2 and you will know if they are a true friend or not. 

These are lessons I have learned along the way in life and still practice.

Your thoughts are welcome...

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Recognizing Truth

Hello Readers,

I have a question for you. Have you ever been turned down for job that you knew you were perfectly qualified for? What did you do? Did you call the recruiter to inquire about any mistakes you can learn from (which I highly recommend doing)? Or did you reapply for the same job again because they must have made a mistake (yes people have done this many times over). The truth is you did NOT get the job; therefore, you need to ask what you can improve upon and Keep It Moving (K.I.M.)! Accept the truth that you were not hired and keep applying for jobs. Do not become stuck on what you “want” to be real but it really isn’t.  I recently had a moment of truth and let’s say it was a truth I should have recognized a long time ago but, I refused to because I wanted it to be what I imagined it could be. The ironic thing is I witness clients do this all the time. At times they do not see or better yet want to confront, what is in front of them concerning their careers and life, however I can see it bright as day. We all need someone who can stand on the outside of us and tell us what we do not see. Isn’t it amazing how we all need each other to help us as I stated last week? 

Here are 3 tips to help you recognize truth:

1. Ask the opinion of people you REALLY trust. Your friends and family see things you can’t see which will impact your life and career.

2. If 2-3 total strangers tell you the same thing then it is the truth, believe it. 

3. Do a weekly if not daily self-examination. Take time to think about why you do the things you do, believe me, there is a reason and you will find it only if are honest with yourself.

Your thoughts are welcome...

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Who believes in you?

Hello Readers,

I cannot believe is it July already! My birthday month. #JulyBabiesRock. Okay now that is out the way, I wanted to talk to you about having the right people in your corner. Back in my corporate America days I always sought advice from one of my close friends about career moves before I made them. To this day I am still close to that one particular friend and I still bring her up to speed with the many endeavors I am involved in.  As I matured in my relationships I have met many people who have kept me encouraged and have helped me to keep my vision at the forefront of my thinking. There have been times when I have gotten bored with the present because I was so excited about entering the future. Have you ever done that? I am sure we all have from time to time. This is the main reason of why having one or two friends to share your vision with is imperative. If you are married, make sure you are sharing your visions with your spouse of course. I have at minimum two friends I can share my crazy and insane ideas with and they thoroughly believe in me. Who are your two friends? Who has your back? Who will save you from you? Something to think about. 

Watch this week’s Career Tip of the Week: Who believes in you? 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BeoeWTlp3Hw

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 Your thoughts are welcome…

 www.truthspeakscoaching.com

 MJW

My new friend

Hello Readers,

I just came back from the Association for Talent Development International Conference and Exposition better known as ATD ICE. This year this annual event was held in beautiful Denver, Colorado at the convention center. The conference hosted over ten thousand people from all over the world. I had the great opportunity to meet people from the Netherlands, Brazil, China, Japan, and Canada. I made lasting connections with a few people from here in the states as well. One relationship I wanted to share with you is with my new found friend from Tokyo, Ami. Ami sat next to me in one of the sessions we attended. The funny thing about us meeting was I asked her for some lotion and she gave me some oil to use (that smelled great by the way). We were friends from that point on. The great thing about this story was Ami was so happy to be at the conference and meet people from the United States. She shared with me that her English was not good but she is working on it, so I found myself translating for her to assist her with speaking to other people (like I know Japanese). She said that she was so happy we met and she wanted to keep in touch and I obliged. I am happy to say I have a friend now in Tokyo, Japan. Through meeting Ami I have opened my mindset more to the beautiful world that is out there and the people that occupy it and that my reader is a wonderful thing. 

Here is picture of Ami and I:

www.truthspeakscoaching.com

MJW

 

Imagine this

Hello Readers,

I had the privilege to be honored with the Outstanding Alumni Award from my alma mater Strayer University this past weekend. I spoke to over 3k people which included 1k graduates and it was a great and humbling experience. I spoke to the graduates about imagining their future. I wanted to share with you some of my speech. I hope it encourages you as I was encouraged to write it.

Imagine these three things:

1. Imagine surrounding yourself with allies. You will never rise higher than the sum total of the 5 people you hang around. You have crossed into a new realm, and some people will not be able to handle all the greatness you are about to birth into the world.

2. Imagine what you want and place it on a vision board or in a vision book. Look at them daily. The brain thinks in pictures. For example, if I tell you to think about a black car you picture a black car right? You did not picture the letters BLACK CAR right. It is amazing how the brain works, studies have proven that if you constantly put images of what you want in front of you, your brain will automatically go to work at trying to attract the images you have set before it. Therefore, ask yourself what are you putting before your eyes? We will become what we think about the most. It is a self-fulfilling prophecy.

3. Imagine doing what your heart desires! If you say you can then you will, if you say you can’t then you won’t. It really is that simple.

I hope you enjoyed a snippet of the speech. It will be available on our YouTube Channel later this week 

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCC7fGDaK8PbYXWh9706HZ6A

Your Thoughts are welcome

MJW

www.truthspeakscoaching.com